Practical Strategies to Reduce Wedding Planning Stress

Planning a wedding is a fun but complicated journey that often comes with its fair share of stress. From managing countless details to juggling various vendors, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and kind of start hating the whole thing.

But, by adopting a few key organizational and practical strategies, you can significantly reduce the stress and enjoy the process of bringing your dream wedding to life.

The Usual Suspects

Everyone will tell you that hiring a wedding planner will help you to manage the stress of planning your wedding. And it does. But—as a wedding videographer, I see firsthand how couples who are well-organized and supported by a good planner are able to relax and fully enjoy their special day.

I don’t want to spend too much time on this—you already know this is an option.

Using Checklists/Organization Tools

I don’t have to tell any couple who’s planning how important being organized is. The Excel and Google Sheets mapping is legendary. But I do want to mention something to my ADHD couples.

There’s tasking tool called Sunsama that you might benefit from.

Sunsama is different because it takes ALL the to-dos from all your other efficiency apps and tech stacks (your calendar, Asana, Trello, Email, Slack, and Zapier for things that aren’t natively integrated…).

It’s pretty amazing.

Facing Deadlines

Managing deadlines, especially when working with multiple vendors, is crucial to avoiding stress. Understanding which deadlines are firm and which ones have flexibility can make a big difference.

• Firm Deadlines: Booking your venue and getting final guest counts to your caterer often require firm commitments.
• Flexible Deadlines: You might be facing analysis paralysis when it comes to booking photo & video and you want to make sure you book the RIGHT package but are having a hard time deciding. You can ask your favorite if you can book just hours of coverage now and decide on deliverables later on in the planning process. You’ll be surprised how many vendors are thrilled to help out.

Communication Tips:

During the inquiry process, maintain clear communication with vendors—even if you’re just price shopping. It’s OK to say these things. Let them know your timeline for making a decision, even if you’re unsure when you’ll get back to it.

Vendors appreciate transparency and tend to respond in kind.

Just as you dislike when vendors are gatekeepers of their information, they don’t like being left in the dark either. If you’re no longer considering a vendor, it’s courteous to inform them so they can focus on other potential clients. (And stop with the annoying follow-ups.)

One last note on that:

Marking a vendor’s follow-up emails as spam without previously responding to them first can negatively impact small businesses. A simple message stating that you’ve gone in a different direction is sufficient and appreciated. If a business continues to contact you after (and I mean… many times, not just “hey, just curious why you chose someone else…”) THEN it’s OK to mark them as the spammers they’re acting like.

Boundaries with Friend & Family

Setting Boundaries with Communication

Wedding planning can quickly become overwhelming, especially when everyone—from family to friends—wants to offer their advice and opinions. Setting clear boundaries around communication is essential to prevent burnout and maintain your sanity.

One effective strategy is to designate specific times for wedding-related discussions. For instance, you could reserve an hour each evening to go over details with your partner or respond to emails, while keeping other parts of the day wedding-free.

It’s also important to establish boundaries with well-meaning but overly involved loved ones. (We all have them.) You get to make a schedule to discuss your wedding—you do not have to do it at the whim of anyone who asks.

Politely let them know when you’re available to discuss wedding plans and when you need some space.

This not only helps you manage stress but also ensures that your relationships remain positive and supportive throughout the planning process.

Reassuring Family Members

Family members often become anxious during wedding planning, especially if they’re deeply invested in the event. (Hi, mom.)

Reassuring them that everything is under control can help ease their stress—and yours. Regularly update key family members on progress, share your plans, and involve them in tasks that align with their strengths and interests. For example, if your mom is great with flowers, involve her in discussions with the florist.

Clear and calm communication is key. Use logic and facts to reassure them, like showing them how much of the planning is already completed or sharing the timeline you’ve set. This approach helps to keep everyone on the same page and reduces the chances of last-minute panic.

Speaking of Logic—Lean into That for Yourself

Emotions can run high during wedding planning, but keeping a logical perspective can help you navigate concerns and avoid unnecessary stress.

When faced with worries—whether your own or from others—take a step back and assess the situation rationally. If a family member is concerned about the weather, focus on the practical solutions you’ve put in place, like a backup plan for an outdoor ceremony. You have no control over the weather—not to mention weather makes your photos and video look amazing.

By addressing emotional concerns with logical responses, you can help diffuse tension.

One thing I like to do is re-read “Soundtracks: The Surprising Solution to Overthinking” (Jon Acuff) over and over and over again. If you’re an overthinker—that book is for you.

Personal Well-being and Self-Care

Exercise and Physical Activity

Staying physically active during the wedding planning process is not only beneficial for your health but also a powerful way to relieve stress.

If you have an impossibly busy schedule, even short bursts of activity—like a 10-minute stretch a quick jog, or good old fashioned jumping jacks—can make a significant difference.

One surprising activity you could choose is actually dance lessons. While is can technically be wedding related—you don’t have to put the pressure on yourselves for making this a big production or even choreographed at all. You can just take dance lessons for the fun of learning how to do it.

The benefit that dancing brings is you can’t think much except for what your next move will be. It’s a little like rock climbing that way except much, much closer to the ground.

Mindfulness and Meditation

Mindfulness and meditation are excellent practices for managing wedding-related anxiety and staying grounded throughout the planning process. They help you stay present, cut down on overthinking, and manage the inevitable stress that comes with organizing such an important event.

There are numerous apps available, such as Headspace or Calm, that offer guided meditation sessions tailored to different needs, whether you’re looking for a quick five-minute break or a longer session to unwind before bed.

I love Headspace for their adorable animations (especially when I’m tight on time and just don’t really feel like doing it—those little buggers calm my nerves) and, to the surprise of no one, I adore Calm for their bedtime stories of Humphrey the Cat and his adventures walking around in different cities.

There’s nothing more soothing and calming than listening to Humphrey in London—it’s just interesting enough to start out with but it’s also incredibly soothing yet not so interesting you won’t fall asleep to it. Which is exactly the point of a bedtime story. (And you just can’t beat a bedtime story with a British accent.)

Self-Care Activities

In the lead-up to your wedding, it’s essential to schedule time for self-care.

There’s always booking a massage or a spa day (but that quickly gets expensive unless you’re fortunate enough where that’s not a budgetary concern). But treating yourself to a mani/pedi, or even a quiet afternoon reading your favorite book.

These activities provide a much-needed break from planning, allowing you to recharge both physically and mentally.

My favorite selfcare is just myself and a Venti Starbucks Chocolate Cold Brew (maybe a little lemon loaf) hanging out in my car at Hyannis Harbor with my laptop at dawn. No husband. No co-dependant animals that need my attention. No loud table next to me that somehow thinks it’s appropriate to listen to the news on their phone without headphones. My email is turned off. My phone is on silent.

Does it look like I’m doing some kind of weird surveillance every week? Probably. Do I care? Not in the slightest—because it puts me in the BEST mood every time. It clears my head. I feel like I have so much space in that hour or two I’m there.

Self-care isn’t just about pampering yourself; it’s about making sure you’re in the best possible state of mind as you approach your big day. By intentionally setting aside time for yourself, you can reduce stress, improve your mood, and ensure that you’re feeling your best as your wedding day approaches.

You just have to find that thing that makes you undeniably happy.

Mindset and Emotional Resilience

Accepting Imperfections

One of the most important aspects of wedding planning is accepting that not everything will go perfectly—and that’s okay. Whether it’s a minor hiccup like a floral arrangement being slightly off or a more significant issue like a last-minute change in the weather, learning to embrace imperfections can significantly reduce your stress levels.

With the right frame of mind, these imperfections can become some of the most memorable and cherished parts of your wedding day.

Don’t underestimate the power of a good hiccup—sometimes, these unexpected moments create the stories that you’ll laugh about and treasure for years to come. The essence of your wedding day is the celebration of your love and commitment, not the perfection of every detail.

Expecting the Unexpected

Even with meticulous planning, unexpected events can arise. Whether it’s an unforeseen life event, a change in job status, a sudden change in your wedding plans, or a minor mishap on the big day, being mentally prepared for the unexpected is crucial.

Instead of fearing what might go wrong, try to adopt a flexible mindset that allows you to adapt to changes as they come.

Consider creating backup plans for key elements of your wedding, indoor backups for outdoor weddings are always a good idea, you can also purchase wedding insurance—it’s really helped couples who hoped they would never need it.

This proactive approach not only helps you feel more in control but also ensures that you’re prepared to handle any surprises with grace. Embracing the unexpected can lead to some of the most memorable and special moments of your wedding.

Self-Compassion

Throughout the wedding planning journey, it’s essential to practice self-compassion. Planning a wedding is like having a second (unpaid) full time job, and it’s natural to feel stressed or overwhelmed at times.

Instead of criticizing yourself acknowledge stress and mishaps are all a normal part of the process. They happen to vendors all the time, it’s just literally our job to make it go away—and we’re good at it because we do it all the time. You’re planning ONE wedding. You can’t expect yourself to be perfect at it.

Incorporate small acts of self-care into your routine, take a break to read a guilty-pleasure book, enjoy a simple cup of tea, or take a few deep cleansing breaths.

Remind yourself that it’s okay to ask for help, take a step back when needed, and not have everything figured out all the time. By being kind to yourself, you can navigate the emotional ups and downs of wedding planning with greater resilience and peace.

To Wrap This All Up

While wedding planning can feel overwhelming, especially with so many details to manage, it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do it all on your own. Whether you choose to work with a planner, or enlist the help of your wedding party and family, these strategies can greatly reduce your stress and allow you to truly enjoy your special day.

Know that you’ve got this. The day will be amazing. You’re amazing. And you’re marrying the love of your life. Nothing else matters.

Contact me today to learn more about our wedding videography services and how we can help you preserve your special moments.